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November 19 2017

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January 05 2017

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May 29 2015

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cheshirelibrary:

How To Tell If You Are In A High Fantasy Novel

[via The Toast]

  • The Elders would like a word with you.
  • The Ritual is about to begin.
  • Something that has not happened in a thousand years is happening.
  • You are going to the City. There is only one City. It is only said with a capital C. No one needs to bother saying the name of the City. It is the City.
  • Certain members of the Council are displeased with your family’s recent actions.
  • A bard is providing occasional comic relief; no one hired or invited him and his method of earning a living is unclear.
  • The High Priest is not to be trusted.
  • Someone is eating an apple mockingly.
  • There is one body of water. It is called the Sea. The Great Sea, if you are feeling fancy.
  • You live in a region with no major exports, no centralized government, no banking system, a mysteriously maintained network of roads, and little to no job training for anyone who is not a farmer.
  • You have red hair. You wear it in a braid. Your father was a simple man, and you don’t remember much about him – he died when you were so young – but you remember his strong hands, as he fished or carpentered or whatever it was that he used to do with them.
  • You’re going to have to hurry, or you’re going to miss the Fair – and you never miss the Fair.
  • There is trouble at the Citadel.
  • Your full name has at least one apostrophe in it.
  • It is the first page, and you are already late for something. Your mother affectionately chides you as you gulp down a few spoonfuls of porridge; she will be dead by page forty-two.
  • There are two religions in your entire universe. One is a thinly veiled version of Islam. It is only practiced by villains. The other is “being a Viking.” You are a Viking.
  • There are new ways in the land that threaten the Old Way. Your grandmother secretly practices the Old Way, as do all of the people of the hills.
  • The real trouble began the day you arrived at court. Every last nobleman hides a viper in his smile. How you long for the purity of life in your village, which is currently on fire or something.

I'm curious. Reblog this and explain the origin of your URL in the tags.

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flunkled:

water jet cutting an apple in half

walkthemoonmoon:

INCREDIBLY IMPORTANT

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colourblindedsouls:

I love how they all have this one really serious picture except the husky

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did-you-kno:

Let’s review.

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YEP.

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NOPE.

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Yuh huh.

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Nuh uh.

Source

overnight-shipping:

kittanzer0:

so on the bus this morning

we stop at a red light and this lady gets off

she goes about half a block down, and then we saw her freeze and run after the bus

SHE FORGOT HER ENTIRE BABY ON THE BUS

I love the use of the word entire as in she could have just left the leg of the baby but no she left the whole baby

sniffing:

stability:

sniffing:

there’s nothing more annoying than finding out traffic isn’t being caused by a big accident but instead by fucking idiots that don’t know how to drive and like going 40 mph on the highway

nothing?

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furries are the only exception

what makes the signs super sad

thebeyshack:

zodiac–signs:

Aries: people ignoring what they say
Taurus: being pressured into doing smth they dislike
Gemini: being misunderstood/not being heard
Cancer: feeling left out
Leo: not having their efforts recognized
Virgo: feeling useless/like they’re a burden to people
Libra: making wrong, unfixable decisions
Scorpio: having their private stuff exposed
Sagittarius: being accused of something they didn’t do
Capricorn: working for nothing
Aquarius: feeling stupid/not smart enough
Pisces: disappointing someone they care about

princeprimrose:

if you were abused or are being abused by your parents as a minor you have probably heard something along the lines of “I do so much for you and I get THIS in return?” or “you’re so lucky to have everything you want!” or even “you don’t think about anyone but yourself”

but they’re wrong. they’re so wrong. they tell you this so you find nothing wrong with the way they’re treating you. and consequently you no longer feel you deserve the things every human being deserves and need to live:

love. love for oneself especially is a big one. your parents betrayed your trust and abandoned you emotionally and if the people you are taught to trust betray you, then how can you possibly think we’ll of yourself?

but you are so good. you are good and kind and have survived so many things no one should have to be put through. you are beautiful and strong and deserve all the love and care in the world. if you can’t convince yourself of it on your own yet hear me now:

you ARE good. you ARE kind. you DO deserve kindness and love.

sonoci:

chantillyxlacey:

sportygoth:

ok but what if subspecies of Jigglypuff sing different music styles. Like some sing catchy pop music, country, screamo, ect

#can’t you imagine a jigglypuff standing up clearing their throat and #-DEATH METAL SCREECH- JIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII-

I COULDN’T RESIST DRAWING THIS

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